Tuesday, June 30, 2009
"The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in?
In your heart, in your mouth, in your soul.
And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both grow old.
Well I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I hope so."
I looked around the interwebs forever trying to find if the breeze is salty around Niagara Falls, but my efforts were fruitless. Still, seeing the rushing water and the fine mist of the falls made me think of an ocean spray, a fine veil of water and salt. This bottle, with a picture of the falls on it, is filled with ordinary table salt.
The fillers have been pretty bland lately, we need a little color,
Monday, June 29, 2009
I couldn't think of anything that reminds me of home more than Stove Top stuffing mix. Stove Top, turkey, biscuits, and mashed potatoes; absolute perfection. Thanksgiving is not complete without Stove Top, which, in my personal opinion, blows away any home-made crap you can pull out of the bird's butt.
Filler = Stove Top stuffing mix (dry). The kid on the label could be me. We used to clear out our garage at home and skate while it rained or snowed outside. The garage sessions bring back awesome memories of growing up and Stove Top does the same thing; all the great family memories baked into tiny, flavorful croutons.
I had a handful of the dry mix while filling the bottle...
I couldn't help it,
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Icing is to cake as salty crackers are to soup. They are practically a necessity for any kind of creamy soup or hearty chili. The two go hand-in-hand; the savory, smooth, liquid with the salty, crunchy solid.
Anyway, I filled this bottle today with delicious, salty, buttery, oyster crackers. They taste like briny little biscuits; I am growing thirsty just thinking about them...hence the water on the label.
Plus oysters remind me of water,
Saturday, June 27, 2009
There is not a lot of us out there, but believe it or not I am not the only person named "Mitch". There's David Hasselhoff's character from Baywatch, the amazing late Mitch Hedberg, and the best-selling author Mitch Albom.
As fate would have it, a family moved in across the street from us a while back with a young child that had been stamped with the slightly off-beat name. Growing up he had to live with the title of "Little Mitch" while I was crowned "Big Mitch". I watched Mitch grow up through the toddler years and babysat him all through elementary school.
I obtained this bottle at Little Mitch's high school open house. It really ages me to go to the open house of a person I once babysat, but my congratulations go out to him. At this open house he had custom Jones Soda bottles featuring senior pictures of himself. I struggled for a while thinking of good, meaningful Mitch-like filler, and had plenty of ideas related to things we were into growing up. But I thought that, since he was off to college, I'd throw in a classic college staple - Ramen Noodles and chicken-flavored seasoning.
I've been answering a lot of his questions about college, GVSU, etc. One I haven't been asked yet is in regards to Ramen Noodles. To answer preemptively, yes, there will be Ramen Noodles and there will be a large amount of them.
And you will learn to love them,
Friday, June 26, 2009
This one is coming under the wire, the time is now 11:58pm. This bottle was filled a long, long time ago with black cherry gummy bears, my favorite. At the time they had filled the bottle to the cap, but over the years they have shrunken leaving a substantial space.
Ah, what a night,
I could not think of a title to save my life, luckily Bryson was here to throw out the "delicious and nutritious" line. Nice.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The birth of the Jones-a-Day idea started with this bottle. The rebirth of the collective spirit, the drive to save and display was inspired by this Jones. I promised a little more history with this post, so stay tuned.
I was making the move from the townhouse back into the house I grew up in, back with the parents, the cats, and the family. Part of this move motivated me to clean out my closet; both mentally and physically. While sorting through the various trash in my physical closet I found an Easter basket containing the green, plastic, fake grass and a bag of the crisp, yellow, fake straw. I had some empty Jones bottles from back in High School and the gears started turning. I filled one bottle with each type of Easter basket grass, this was one of the two. Oh, did I mention "spoiler alert"? Sorry, one of the bottles is filled with plastic, green, fake Easter grass.
Now you know,
P.S. - So the Easter grass was a symbol for my resurrected vitality. The relationship between the filler and label, however, was not so elegant. Basically the trashcan made me think of little bits of garbage. The yellow fake grass made an awful mess during the filling process and littered my room with little bits of garbage as I expected it would. Hence the relationship circle is complete.
Also, over Spring Break, the family and I went to Washington D.C. After visiting all the memorials we took a break near the reflecting pool. It was just after the Winter season so the grass was mostly dried, yellow, and dead. We ate subs on benches like the one pictured here next to garbage cans like the one on the label.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
This is actually one of my favorite bottles and I had intended to save it for later. It was filled previously with the little metal tabs you get off of soda cans.
In a hurry again today, I have the whole day tomorrow for filling bottles and posting so look forward to a better description tomorrow.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Sorry, in a hurry today, just on my way out to get in line for Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen. It's five hours early, but center seats are of the up-most importance.
Bottle was filled today with elbow macaroni noodles bought specifically to fill a bottle.
See you all tomorrow,
Monday, June 22, 2009
We saw one like this back on Day 22. This is water with green food coloring mixed - sort of - with vegetable oil. This bottle, however, is bigger, contains green water, and the oil looks thicker and frothier. The oil looks almost like clouds hanging above the water.
I don't know if the label has any connections with the filler. Think of one yourselves,
Sunday, June 21, 2009
I couldn't put good advice in a bottle. There was no way to fill one with reassuring pats on the back or thoughtful life lessons. You can't bottle being taught how to shave.
You can't fill a bottle with good parenting.
Dad, thanks for being there, and thanks for letting us know that you always will be. Thanks for understanding, for laughing when we make jokes, for being an honest, strict-enough friend. Thanks for driving the family all across the country, for putting up with all of our crap, for listening to us when we need to talk, and talk, and talk. For always talk, talk, talking. Thank you for everything.
This bottle was filled this Father's Day with malted milk balls, his favorite.
A photo of firefighter jackets is pictured on the label, a real heroic picture; reminds me of my dad.
A proud and lucky son,
Saturday, June 20, 2009
So I've gotten a little flak for putting cereals into a handful of my Jones Soda bottles. But please, let me explain, cereal makes amazing filler. It is cheap, normally colorful, and usually abundant. One box of cereal could fill a six pack of bottles, or more. So give me a break.
I filled this bottle today with Honey Comb cereal. The cereal was pretty old and stale, so I feel like it wasn't a complete waste.
For some reason I connect cereal directly to my family. We've always had so many different cereals in the house and I feel my family has been there through my evolution of cereal tastes; gradually getting more and more adult in content. Sledding also has a strong family vibe for me given we used to go as a family every Winter. Hence the sledding family and the cereal filler.
I really want a bowl of Honey Combs now,
P.S. - I've kept the box of cereal in my room...been resisting the urge to rip into it ever since.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Filled previously with Smarties wrappers. Had I been a bigger smarty back then, I would have filled another bottle with the candy that had been inside each wrapper. But I was young and thirsty for sugar...and at that point this project was not even a thought.
Sorry that the posts have been coming late. The thing about making money is, most of the time, you have to work.
Lightning is painting the sky with fluorescent flashes of flickering filaments, I love it,
Thursday, June 18, 2009
So my family owns three cats; an orange stray that we took in named Oscar, a white lap-cat named Ollie (Olliver), and a black cat that acts like a kitten all the time named Ozzy (Oswald). Since the cats spend half the day sleeping and the other half eating, there is always the kibble-like cat food on hand. Given the size, shape, and availability, of course cat food had to end up in a bottle at some point.
The shoes pictured on the label reminded me of my old skate shoes which I just replaced today. So the bottle was chosen in honor of them and the four years of skating they served me. I also thought it was kind of funny putting cat food in a bottle that features and dog on the label.
(that was supposed to be a joke...you know, like "chow" as in food, not "chow" as in "tchao" or "good-bye". Oh, nevermind.)
P.S. - I kept taking other pictures without the time stamp and forgetting to put it back on when I snapped a pic of my Jones. So I made a little reminder on the block I use to steady my shots...
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
So just under the wire today, posting with 41 minutes of Wednesday left. Had a late start after the bowling fiasco last night, thank you's to Em and dad for everything, then I had to work all night.
Nothing stellar today, the only exciting part of this post is that it is the last in the "paint on the inside" line. Really it was a cool idea and the bottles look sweet in real life, but they're not that exciting in print. So this one has been painted on the inside with some green paint leftover from my mom's scrap-booking convention center...I think.
See everyone tomorrow,
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
I'm not even sure what to say about this one. I mean, personally, at least in real life, the bottle looks pretty cool. Basically I took one big cube of styrofoam and painstakingly ripped it apart into individual styrofoam "molecules" and "atoms". The squeaking was almost unbearable as I ripped the foam into individual balls and small groups of two or three.
Bottle was filled sometime in May,
Monday, June 15, 2009
I hate it, hate it when people get all uppity and offended when you haven't tried a semi-famous food that they are in love with. They huff and puff and say, "you haven't lived until you've had a [insert iconic food here]". But really, really, you haven't lived until you've had a White Castle burger. I don't want to say it, because, again, I hate, hate it when people use the phrase "literally" when in fact there is nothing literal about what they are saying, but these burgers literally melt in your mouth. Nothing beats a warm White Castle, nothing.
So with that said, remind me to never fill a bottle with anything made of card-stock again. Like the Pokemon cards, the White Castle burger "sleeves" don't pack well into a bottle. I filled this one about an hour ago thinking I could persuade the sleeves to unfurl and fill the bottle; mission failure.
There is something so retro about the label that I imagine it was taken in the 1970's. A cute girl in retro style shorts pushing around a parking lot, barefoot, on a retro style board. I imagine a group of teenagers sitting around a White Castle parking lot, eating burgers, kicking around on four wheels. Obviously the picture is not that old, but part of me wants it to be.
The savory smell of burger and onion is overwhelmingly delicious,
P.S. - Happy thirtieth wedding anniversary to my parents. I tried to think of a funny, sentimental blurb, I tried to find a wedding quote on Google, but nothing can sum up the relationship you two have and the happiness that you fill your children with. Thanks for everything.
P.P.S. - Just so everyone knows, no, I did not eat this entire case. Between the three of us there were still about ten left. This is just a pic of a leftover burger with the still full Jones.
Here's what the crave case looks like, I added a surprise inside. Normally there are thirty burgers inside, but in this pic there are only twenty-seven burger sleeves and an empty Jones bottle. Note the greasy goodness in and on the case.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
This bottle was filled today with pieces of a broken ceramic garbage can and pieces of a broken dinner plate. Broken and brought to us courtesy of one of the family cats.
I'd tell you which one, but they all had the same "I've done something wrong but am completely innocent" face as the cat on the label,
Saturday, June 13, 2009
"Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality." (Emily Dickinson)
Ruth Martha LaVoie
Born October 13, 1918
Died June 10, 2009
You were a mother to my mother, a grandmother to me; you will be greatly missed and remembered forever.
Never stop smiling.
Bless the next life with your laugh,
Friday, June 12, 2009
Early post today, but I will be leaving town in about eight hours and will, hopefully, be back by Saturday night for tomorrow's post. So, don't be surprised or hurt if the next installment is late.
Anyways, these beads came out of the filtering system of our backyard pool. I don't remember the circumstances that allowed me to take them out of the filter, and I honestly don't know what purpose they serve in the filtering process, but I figured they would make decent fill for a bottle.
That is Matt Hoffman the BMX rider on the label...nothing to do with filters, pools, water, or anything.
Bottle was filled a while ago. See you guys soon,
P.S. - To Bre,
You say you love Tic-Tacs, you should see how many I have left over. My breath will be fresh for weeks.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Two lovers, from what I imagine, two high school sweethearts sit in the summer sun, playfully scribbling with chalk. I think of first loves. I think about the puppy love feeling, the butterflies, the shy smiles and sparks at the very sight of the other person. The joy felt when they talk, the goosebumps their fingertips excite. I think of first kisses.
The pressures of a first kiss. The techniques to consider, the placement of your hands, the freshness of your breath. I think of hurried squirts of breath fresheners, the rapid crunch of breath-mints, nervous trembling hands.
Bottle was filled yesterday with Tic-Tac "freshmints",
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
This is my favorite bottle to date. No, it doesn't look the coolest, but it is filled with something very close to my heart. Peanut butter, can you think of anything more delicious? Spread some on a cracker, a piece of toast, a cookie, anything! Peanut butter can make 95% of foods taste better based on a study that I just made up.
And the label! Remember the Mr. Ed peanut butter myth? How people used to think that the crew of the show put peanut butter on the horse's gums to make his mouth move? Turns out this was just a rumor that was started by Alan Young, the person playing the lead role.
Hmmmm...a peanut butter flavored Jones...,
P.S. - The process;
Scoop a bunch of the sticky, saliva-inducing substance into a pot.
Stir non-stop over low heat and pretty soon the peanut butter will be a pancake batter like consistency.
Pretty soon the peanut butter will be very fluid...like peanut butter soup.
Pour into bottle.
Allow to cool. The bottle was extremely hot and the peanut butter peaked around 167 degrees Fahrenheit but held steady at 161 degrees F.
Voila! Peanut butter in a bottle.
Forgot to mention that the kitchen smelt spectacular for about a half-hour while I was melting the peanut butter.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
The second bottle in the "paint on the inside" series. I actually applied two "coats" to the inside of this bottle using the same technique as the bottle in Day 27. But no matter how slowly I churned it as it dried, it always came out splotchy; I guess the paint was too watery or the bottle wasn't clean enough on the inside. The end effect actually looks pretty cool though.
Day 30? That's, like, a month. Only 11 more to go,
P.S. - I turned the flash on and the "cool effect" was more visible.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Can't think of anything witty to say about this bottle...except that is does everything but suck. You see, it is filled with vacuum cleaner lint and dirt collections. So that "suck" comment was intended to be witty.
Whatever, bottle was filled previously,
Sunday, June 7, 2009
So "gummy" has always been my favorite genre of candy; gummy bears, gummy worms, gummy frogs, gummy sharks. If it was gummy, I'd eat it. So when I was first introduced to gummy peaches I was absolutely hooked and demanded them all the time. You can tell this bottle was filled a while ago because the gummy peaches have since hardened and shrunk, leaving a good amount of space under the lid.
It was full at one time, I promise,
P.S. - Holy crap! I just realized that the previous picture did not have a date stamp on it! I was taking a picture for another site, a forum, and was deciding between date stamp or no date stamp. I guess I forgot to put it back on. Oops!
Saturday, June 6, 2009
This bottle isn't really "filled" with anything. Take the cap off and you'll find nothing but air in the space inside the bottle. Instead, the inside of the bottle has been painted with paint leftover after redecorating my room. I poured the paint into the bottle using a funnel fashioned out of paper and slowly rolled the bottle around in my hands until I had even coverage all over. As the paint dried, if I let the bottle sit on its base, the paint ran down and collected on the bottom inside the bottle leaving patches. So, I had to keep the bottle rotating as the paint dried. It was kind of a process, but turned out to be a pretty cool idea.
I filled this bottle and others like it about a month ago, but allowed a lot of time for drying,
Friday, June 5, 2009
So this one was hard to light, hard to photograph, and may be hard to explain. So a while back I was convinced my family was under attack. Someone was targeting our house and terrorizing us. I had thought all the fish in the pond had been stolen, we found a raccoon hanging from our tree-house, and the back window of the family van had been shot out with a pellet gun. This bottle is filled with the broken glass from this window. It is dark, tinted, and shattered into small cube-like chunks as safety glass is designed to do.
It turns out that the fish were just oddly shy and hiding that day and the raccoon had gotten trapped by accident. Still, someone shot out the window,
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Do your part to control the Dihydrogen Monoxide epidemic. This substance is used in nuclear power plants, it contributes to the erosion of natural landscapes, is commonly found in acid rain, can cause severe burns, and has been known to kill thousands every year. Do your part. Say "no" to Dihydrogen Monoxide.
I dreaded posting these bottles. They've been in my collection for a long time. Their contents are more sentimental than eye-catching. And, like with the ROYGBIV bottles, I was going to use these for two different days, but that would be a very unexciting two days. The bottle on the left is filled with water from my backyard pool. It looks like normal water in the picture, it looks like normal water in real life. It practically is normal water but I know that those molecules have contributed to many fun times splashing around in that pool. I know that it is more than normal water. The label has a skateboarder riding through a tunnel. It appears to be wet and rainy, it kind of looks like he is skating through a wave.
The bottle on the right is filled with water from our backyard pond. This water has little pieces of algae and other bits of, I'm guessing, miscellaneous fish waste. The picture on the bottle shows a flooded front yard - or is it a picture of a pool with a flooded cover?. Either way, it made me think of our pond.
My dad is getting the pool ready right now. Yay,
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
...is another man's Jones bottle. I remember filling this bottle a while ago, but can't remember what drew me to this label. Part of me feels like whenever we went to the skatepark everything was covered in a fine dust. You could find trash stashed behind the ramps, under the benches, and on the deck of the mini-ramp. The bottle is grungy and raw, so I suppose the image of a skatepark kind of fits.
The bottle has various bits of garbage in it. There are pieces of a free AOL trial disc (might be able to use this fact to date the bottle back a while), scraps of a Butterfingers wrapper, piece of denim from the bottom of an old pair of jeans, fragments of hard candy, and general paper waste.
In case you did not know, every Jones Soda bottle cap has a little message written on the inside. Kind of like fortune cookies, I have an odd rule about these messages. I don't read the cap until the soda is gone and I don't re-read the cap after the bottle has been re-sealed. But I was having trouble thinking of a way to end this post, so I broke rule number two and re-read the cap.
"A happy event will take place shortly in your home",
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
In this bottle is not the kind of tissue you'd use when you have the "snuffles", nor is it the kind of tissue-paper you'd find when opening a nice gift. No, it is the generic, white tissue-paper sometimes found in shipping and packaging. When removing all the items from the box one has to peel the static-cling inducing paper from each product, crumple, and toss.
I'm actually not sure whether or not the label was selected with purpose. Something about the simple softness, the lightness of the paper makes the label fit, however. Bottle was filled within the last couple of weeks.
Try to smile today,
Monday, June 1, 2009
Due to their vastly different molecular structures and properties, the water (a polar molecule) and the vegetable oil (a non-polar hydrocarbon) separate when mixed. This is one of the first bottles filled roughly four years ago with water, red food coloring, and vegetable oil taken from my home's kitchen.
No matter how hard I try, I cannot get them to stay together.